Willpower is a viable solution to obtain things in the external world. How can we get what we want without trying to get it? This seems like an impossible and absurd way to operate especially in a world where we’re used to striving and putting effort into getting what we wish. Now, how exactly does this backwards law work in practice? Or more specifically: how exactly do we get what we want, by not trying to get what we want? This article explores the backwards law and its paradoxical nature, as well as the cause of our ongoing dissatisfaction in life, and how we can liberate ourselves from it. Instead of trying to remove the elephant from our thoughts forcefully, we let it dissipate by itself by leaving it alone. So, if we want to stop thinking about the pink elephant, in this case, giving up our struggle and letting our ‘desire to get rid of it’ dry out is the paradoxical solution. On the flip side: when we stop trying, we’ll have what we want.
Or simply put: the harder we try, the less likely we’ll succeed. The backwards law proposes that the more we pursue something, the more we achieve the opposite of what we truly want and the more disappointed we feel.
Backwards e free#
So could it be that this inclination to be so invested in becoming free from dissatisfaction, trying to be happy, trying to be content, is exactly the reason we aren’t? Here we see the paradox of willpower, which is the basis of ‘the law of reversed effort’ also referred to as ‘the backwards law’ by philosopher Alan Watts. Ironically, the more we try to be less dissatisfied, the more dissatisfied we become. The pink elephant, in this case, represents our general dissatisfaction, which may manifest as negative emotions like sadness, stress, anger, or boredom. But we could also use this simile as a metaphor for how we approach dissatisfaction with life. The elephant simile is commonly used to show how difficult it is to get rid of intrusive thoughts by force. And the more we try to get rid of it, the more it persists.
Because as soon as the pink elephant appears in our minds, it’s impossible to get rid of it by consciously not thinking about it. What if we’d try not to think of a pink elephant.
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